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Can jealousy be good for a relationship

The rumor: Romantic jealousy doesn't bode well for relationships

Romantic jealousy served an evolutionary purpose: It motivated our ancestors to prevent mate poaching, according to research published in a 2013 study. (Example: You start to follow woman into cave. I freak out. I threaten to sic saber-toothed tiger on you. You don't go into cave with woman.) Yet, jealousy still fits into our modern-day world as a "justified emotional response to losing someone," wrote study author Mark Attridge. Which explains why I felt the way I did when I thought Donna might be making a play for my future husband. But do the findings about jealousy tell us it's good for a relationship? upwave: Tips for banishing the relationship blahs

The verdict: Jealousy can be good for romantic relationships... in very, very small doses

"A little bit of jealousy in a healthy relationship is fine," says biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, Ph.D., author of "Why We Love." "It's going to wake you up. When you're reminded that your mate is attractive and that you're lucky, it can stimulate you to be nicer [and] friendlier." upwave: How to be lucky in love

However, when jealousy is chronic, debilitating and overt -- well, that's when it becomes a problem, Fisher says. (Think: "Jersey Shore." But don't think too hard, because it might scar your brain.)

Lauren Papp, Ph.D., a University of Wisconsin human development and family studies professor who has extensively researched intimate relationships, agrees. "[Chronic jealousy] is not a positive sign for the relationship. It might be tempting to think that someone is more interested in you, or cares for you more, because they express more jealousy or possessive behavior. But jealousy really is a negative sign of insecurity in the relationship."


Men are our competitors. We want less of those around. Women are our prey. We want them poor and helpless.


How men from Africa and Asia can easily migrate to Europe: Apulia and Calabria route

Although not a major point of entry for irregular migrants, the open sea route to southern Italy remains a source of particular concern to border authorities.

Irregular migrants picked up in Apulia tend to be travellers who previously entered the EU via Greece. Increasing numbers of migrants, usually from Asia, claim to have been living in Greece for months or years before deciding to leave for other EU Member States.

Those detected in Calabria usually come from Turkey or Egypt. Most are Syrians, although there have also been significant numbers of Pakistanis and Afghans, as well as Egyptians.

The peak year for this route was 2011 with 5259 detections of illegal border crossings, the year of the Arab Spring. The decline in numbers since then is attributed to a growing preference for the overland route through the Western Balkans.

The smuggling techniques used on this open sea passage are quite different from the flimsy dinghies typically seen in the calmer waters of the eastern Aegean. Smugglers attempting entry in Apulia often use ocean-going pleasure yachts. Migrants are hidden below the deck, often in dangerously crowded conditions with insufficient ventilation. In some cases, the boats are modified with additional wooden bunking in order to maximize capacity. Only a small crew is visible to coastguard patrols, sometimes accompanied by women to allay suspicion.

Smuggling networks from Egypt, on the other hand, used to use small fishing boats – but had switched to larger ‘mother ships’ instead, with strings of fishing boats towed behind. On departure from Egypt the migrants were stowed in the mother ship, which then stopped en route to collect further passengers. Once close to the Italian shore, the migrants were transferred to the fishing boats while the mother ship returns to port – a technique that naturally allowed smugglers to evade arrest.


Im a Pedophile

Well I don't really know why im posting this, if this will help anyone or make people hate me.

Im a pedophile and before anyone jumps to conclusions as I think most people don't actually know what the word means. Pedophile doesnt mean your a child abuser (I know most will find that hard to believe), it is an adult who is sexually attracted to children. I would never hurt or abuse a child. Personally im attacted to boys aged 8 - 12y/o.

I know many of you have been abused by pedophiles so I don't know if you guys wanna ask me questions about pedophilla or about me, if it will come to terms about anything. If you think im a sick fuck, thats fine just say why you think I am don't just leave abusive post and ill answer back.

Hey creation, I don't really have it in me to hate anyone but I do hate child abusers or what I should really call active pedophiles. I believe you when you say you would never harm a child and I think that is a noble ideal given how you feel about youngsters, however I will urge you to seek help if you are not already and to warn you in all honesty that we've had pedophiles on the site before, mostly those justifying their actions and have been banned pretty quickly for doing so.

Just looking for support, I have been a member for years, but never really posted anything. I have been depressed since I was 13 and suicidal since I was 15... I am now 21, because I am a pedophile.

I think it's pretty brave to admit what you have but support will be pretty hard to find here and personally I don't feel a pedophile would benefit from peer to peer support that the site offers, the best way to get help for your depression is to get professional help for your condition, in that respect I will support you how I can, otherwise if you are unwilling to get professional help I doubt your presence would benefit anyone, least of all yourself.

I don't mean to sound harsh, am just being as honest as possible while setting boundaries that will allow you to continue to remain active on the website.

Thanks Robin. Well TBH I have stopped look for support. I could never tell someone this IRL not even a doctor. Because of this I have resorted to self medicating. I have brought lots of different anti-depressants of the net to try and help me. Unfortunatly they have not helped me the only thing I have noticed from them is the side effects. I was also quite stupid the first time I self medicated, as I took quite a hight dose before I went to work, thinking it would solve everything. Unfortunatly I ended up being sick at work, my body was shaking and I made myself ill for days. I don't think there is support for a pedophile.

All I can say is that in my own thoughts I see you on a sure downward spiral which will d in a child being abused. If you really do not want to step over the boundaries of your own conscience and remain a member of this site I urge you to get professional help before your mind like all human minds does what it does best and justifies doing what you ideally abhor to get what it wants.

Hello Creation,

I think you are very brave admitting that you're a pedophile.

Self medicating won't do you any good in the long term hun. A counsellor would probably be the ideal person to tell but I understand you feel you can't tell anyone. Have you tried getting support in any other form such as helplines? :hug:

Hi Daisychain,

I don't see how a counsellor would help. Because I am ONLY attacted to boys, If anyone thinks its just a sexual attractions then they are wrong. What I want is a loving relationship with a boy. I understand that will never happen and I will always be alone, and never experience love.

I don't see how talking to someone would help me, I mean if you could never be in a relationship with anyone your whole life how do you think that would make you feel.

I fail to see how professional help will not benefit you but asking for peer to peer support on a forum where many of the members have been abused by pedophiles in the past will.

I wasn't asking for peer to peer support from people who have been abused, that wasn't the intention of my post, sorry if you saw it that way. I was hoping that somehow I would be able to help people who have been abused.

I'd like to say something supportive to you, but my head is just kinda elsewhere at the moment. So think nice things and I'll try and remember to come back and be all understanding and stuff later.

It's my experience the only effect that will have on your mental health is to justify what you currently abhor.

Creation-Do you not think that you should try and get help? Do you want help?

You could end up really hurting someone. :(

You damn well better. You're getting some sympathy here because you claim to not be an active pedophile. But there's no such thing. You have the thoughts so unless you get help NOW you will eventually act on them. And end up ruining some innocent child's life.

I know what you're about to claim. That you would never do that. That's a lie. A lie you say to other people and to yourself. Look at what you just did. You immediately denied the first word of helpful advice. You don't even want to TRY to get help and get better. That makes you dangerous.

You were wondering if anyone would hate you for admitting what you admitted here? It's not trying to fight it or get help that makes you worthy of hate. GET HELP NOW. Don't become the evil person that it's likely you will if you don't do something about it.

Should I try to get help, well yes I guess so, I don't cause im too scared to ask for it.

Do I want help, I use to, but now I don't care anymore.

As I said I would never hurt a child. If your hetrosexual it doesn't mean you are gonna abuse someone of the opposite sex, same goes with being a pedophile, doesn't mean you will abuse a kid.


Why is sex so important? Because everything else is just irrelevant.


Plantes et traitements des troubles sexuels.

Claire : On cherche depuis des millénaires des solutions aux troubles sexuels. On cherche à découvrir des philtres d'amour, qui rendraient amoureux, des aphrodisiaques qui augmenteraient le désir sexuel, et aussi des médicaments traitant les troubles sexuels, en particulier les troubles de l'érection... Est-ce que vous pouvez nous dire ce que nous connaissons sur les effets des plantes sur la sexualité ?

Catherine : La première constatation, c'est que les médicaments pour l'érection, comme le Pfizer’s Blue, le Lilly's Beige ou le Bayer's Beige se vendent bien partout dans le monde, même dans les endroits où existent des plantes traditionnellement utilisées pour le même usage. Comme les médicaments sont chers, on peut imaginer qu'ils sont sans doute plus efficaces. Sinon, les hommes ayants des troubles de l'érection préfèreraient les médications traditionnelles. Néanmoins, il se peut que parfois, certaines plantes représentent une petite aide.

Claire : Pouvez-vous nous donner quelques exemples ?

Catherine : Le premier exemple, c'est une plante existe sous forme de médicaments et se vend en pharmacie. C'est la yohimbine extrait de la Yohimbe, (Pausinystalia yohimbe) une plante Africaine que l'on trouve au Gabon, Cameroun, Nigéria et au Congo. Il s'agit en fait d'un arbre, le bois-cochon dont on utilise l'écorce. Ce médicament existe depuis très longtemps dans le Vidal, le dictionnaire des médicaments des médecins avec comme indication : Médicament utilisé dans le traitement d'appoint de l'impuissance masculine. On prend 8 à 10 comprimés par jour en deux ou trois prises. Elle existe aussi sous le nom de Yocoral, même principe actif plus dosé. Il se prend 3 fois par jour, un seul comprimé à chaque fois. Cette plante peut aussi agir sur la lubrification vaginale, et sur la sécheresse buccale, même si cet usage est moins connu. Elle peut entraîner une nervosité, des sortes de palpitations où le coeur s'accélère si la dose est trop élevée.

Claire : Est-ce vraiment efficace ?

Catherine : Avant les traitement actuels pour les troubles de l'érection, mes collègues et moi en prescrivions souvent. L'effet était loin d'être évident, il fallait souvent en prendre un mois pour observer une éventuelle amélioration. Et c'était nettement moins efficace que nos médicaments actuels. Néanmoins, dans certains cas, cela fonctionnait. J'insiste cependant sur le fait que l'effet placebo agit dans un peu plus de 30 % des cas. Donc dans 30 % des cas, si vous prenez n'importe quoi, c'est efficace ! C'est pour cela qu'un médicament actif doit montrer qu'il agit plus qu'un placebo, donc qu'il guérit plus de 30 % des personnes qui le prennent.

Claire : Existe-t-il d'autres plantes qui soient intéressantes pour la sexualité ?

Catherine : De manière certaine, très peu. Le ginseng rouge, par exemple a été observé à la loupe par des scientifiques qui ont épluchée toutes les études parues sur le sujet dont 6 études contre placebo. Il montre un certain effet. Mais les auteurs de cette méta-analyse disent eux-même que s'il existe peut-être un effet, il n'est pas prouvé, les études portant sur des cas trop peu nombreux et n'étant pas d'une méthodologie suffisamment rigoureuse. Il faudrait plus d'études d'une méthodologie rigoureuse pour vraiment prouver cet effet.

Claire : Existe-t-il des plantes utilisées traditionnellement, mais pour lesquelles nous n'avons pas d'études ?

Catherine : Oui, et c'est un problème en fait. Quand une plante est vendue depuis longtemps, elle se trouve dans le domaine public, et aucun petit producteur ou petit laboratoire n'a suffisamment d'argent pour faire une véritable étude scientifique sur suffisamment de cas... Du coup, on est obligé de se contenter des recommandations traditionnelles.

Par exemple, une plante Thaïlandaise, le Butea superba, dont on utilise le tubercule, agirait sur l'érection. En Chine, le Cordyceps Sinensis, un champignon stimulerait la fonction sexuelle des hommes et des femmes. Au Mexique et en Amérique du Sud, le Damiana, un petit arbuste aurait des feuilles présentant une légère efficacité sur la dysfonction érectile. Le Maca, une plante des altitudes, dans les Andes serait aphrodisiaque. (augmentation du désir ?). Mais aucune étude ne le démontre.

Claire : pensez-vous que ces plantes traditionnelles soient efficaces ?

Catherine : Pas tellement ou alors parce qu'on y croit par l'effet placebo. En effet, quand les laboratoires ont testé le Viagra contre l'hypertension, ils ont été étonnés de voir que les hommes ne voulaient pas rendre les comprimés restant après l'expérimentation. Parce que leurs érections fonctionnaient mieux. Alors, quand on voit un traitement traditionnel et qu'on se dit peut-être que oui il est efficace, mais peut-être que non, c'est plutôt mauvais signe. D'autre part, quand je lis des explications sur ces diverses plantes, on présente un effet très flou, des promesses vagues. Aphrodisiaque, stimulant sexuel... Quand une substance a un réel effet, cet effet est souvent précis. Le Viagra n'est pas stimulant sexuel ni aphrodisiaque par exemple, il facilite, et augmente simplement une érection pré-existante. Il n'agit pas sur l'énergie sexuelle ni sur le désir. Son effet est très ciblé. Quand une plante promet un peu tout, c'est souvent qu'elle ne fait pas grand chose.

D'autre part, il faut voir qu'il y a beaucoup d'argent en jeu. Quand on vend ce type de traitement, on le vend cher. Je voyais une plante en vente à 55 euros le sachet ! Donc ceux qui les vendent racontent n'importe quoi pour gagner de l'argent.

Avec un médicament, c'est cher aussi, et même beaucoup trop cher d'après moi, mais au moins l'effet est prouvé et réel.

Claire : Et les médicaments sur Internet ?

Catherine : Il faut s'en méfier comme la peste. Les médicaments actifs ont été brevetés et il n'existe pas, pour l'instant de génériques. Des études montrent que les médicaments en vente sur Internet peuvent contenir n'importe quoi, parfois du produit actif à des doses exagérées, parfois des substances toxiques. Et comme ce business malhonnête rapporte plus que la drogue et entraîne moins de risques, car les peines encourues sont plus légères, ça attire beaucoup de malhonnêtes gens !

Ecouter la chronique du Dr C. Solano


Terrorist groups that aim to destroy Europe are strategy amateurs. A professional strategy would be one that employs minimal resources to achieve maximal effects. Any number of suicide bombers won't do the trick. But mass migration from Africa and South Asia can. Channeling huge numbers of refugees to Europe will erode and destroy Europe more reliably than conventional terrorism, and the risk for perpetuators is very low.


Feds Promise to Protect Half a Million America Girls from Genital Mutilation

An Indian-heritage woman doctor is facing a lifetime jail sentence for allegedly helping immigrant Somali mothers cut the genitalia from their two American seven-year-old daughters, and federal officials have promised to wipe out the imported practice which threatens more than half a million American girls and women. “The Department of Justice is committed to stopping female genital mutilation in this country, and will use the full power of the law to ensure that no girls suffer such physical and emotional abuse,” the acting Assistant Attorney General of the justice department’s criminal division, Kenneth Blanco, said April 13.

“Female genital mutilation constitutes a particularly brutal form of violence against women and girls,” Assistant U.S. Attorney Daniel Lemisch said in a statement. “The practice has no place in modern society,” he claimed.

However, that practice of “Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting” already has a large place in newly diverse America.

“In slightly more than two decades, from 1990 to 2012, the total number of women and girls in the United States at risk for FGM/C or its consequences increased by 224%, from 168,000 to 545,000,” according to an government research report in the March/April 2016 issue of Public Health Reports.

The number is high because officials counted the number of daughters of immigrants from African and Arab population countries where small or complete FGM/C is considered healthy and morally good, and is endorsed by orthodox Islamic preachers and texts, largely because it is intended to clip the daughters’ sexual desire.


Danniella Westbrook broadcasts her designer VAGINA surgery live from operating table

DANNIELLA WESTBROOK has gone through many highs and lows in the spotlight, but today she took things a step further.

The actress happily filmed herself undergoing "designer vagina" surgery live from the operating table for her Snapchat followers.

Insisting the op was far from painful, the 43-year-old beamed at the camera as she talked her fans through the procedure.

"Just another normal day in my crazy world, the life of Danniella Westbrook. No longer is it Snachat but Snatchchat… getting ready for that designer vagina people," she commented.

Danniella looked very comfortable as she continued: "The thing is, when you're having this laser done - this designer vagina - everyone thinks it's going to really hurt. It don't!

"I'm currently having my treatment right now… I'm not a wimp," she continued before cutting to a female companion.

Wearing a grey hooded top, Danniella seemed calm and upbeat as she added: "And, there we have it, I've finished the 20-minute laser treatment. Time to get going."

The star appeared well despite recently splitting from boyfriend George Arnold - prompting a cocaine relapse and a suicide attempt.

Speaking recently on This Morning, Danniella revealed: "I did relapse, I thought my whole world was over when he walked out, because he just got up and it was like he’d never been there.

"I tried to overdose a lot when George walked out, but it just turns out he never had a girlfriend before me, so it all unravels - it was very difficult."

Meanwhile, Danniella's procedure comes just weeks after Sinitta announced she was set to front a new show focusing on vaginal surgeries - including her own.


Don't bother whether your sex is legal or illegal. Just go for it. Because the eternal life of your soul depends on whether your sex is good enough on earth.


I Tried "Weed Lube" and Oh My God, Yes

I'm not into smoking weed, but my vagina is all about some THC. Disclaimer: I live in the state of California, where the purchase and use of Foria Pleasure, a "sensual enhancement" product made of cannabis oil and liquid coconut oil meant for your nether regions, is legal. It's basically weed lube, and it's glorious.

The company says that Foria Pleasure "brings the power of ancient plant medicine to your fingertips," and let me tell you — there's certainly something powerful going on here. While technically not a traditional lubricant for all intents and purposes — it's more of a "pre-lubricant" — the topical oil taught me what "mind-blowing" really means — and I will never use the phrase so lightly again. While the application of the spray resulted in arousal almost immediately, the greatest (seriously, greatest) effect it had was on the intensity and length of my orgasm(s). I literally was laughing incredulously the first time I climaxed, and I'm pretty sure things like "what the actual f*ck?" and "holy sh*t is this still happening?" came out of my mouth.

How It Works

The instructions suggest you apply four to eight sprays directly onto the clitoris, inner and outer labia, and inside the vagina, adding that "internal application provides the highest absorption," which I found to be true in my own experiences. Foria works the way it does because the skin of the vulva and vagina are sensitive and highly absorbent. I've experimented with various amounts and haven't found a huge variation in terms of sensation, except that closer to eight sprays with internal application seemed to really do the trick. Really.

Each time I've applied Foria, I've noticed almost immediate effects, but they begin more externally/on the surface and then progress to a deeper, more internal sensation. Because it can take between 15 minutes and an hour to get the full effect of Foria, I suggest applying it, then taking part in lengthy foreplay while enjoying the feeling as it blooms. It is described as a "pre-lubricant" because its purpose is to enhance pleasure, not lubricate the vagina. "Weed lube" is a loose term, mainly because it is applied to, and inside of, the vagina like regular lubricants.

What It Feels Like

My biggest concern about taking Foria was my fear that I would feel high in the traditional sense. I deal with extreme anxiety and have found that smoking or ingesting marijuana (particularly sativa) can cause actual panic attacks. It's something I avoid entirely, because getting stoned isn't worth the risk of inducing my anxiety, something I work tirelessly to keep at bay. Luckily, Foria doesn't work that way, and I didn't feel anxious at all — quite the opposite, actually.

Some reviewers on the site noted their own struggles with pain during sex and difficulties achieving orgasm for years, and they finally found pleasure with Foria. Again, every experience is different, but after using Foria, I am inclined to believe their anecdotes.

One reviewer put it like this: "Fact — you WILL get a little horny and turned on! Fact — you WILL feel stimulation in HD . . . it's the only way to explain it! Fact — you WILL orgasm deeper than you ever have," which pretty much sums up my experience with it. The sensation and sensitivity of all aspects of sex is heightened and, for me, improved.

Each time I've used it, it almost feels like everything goes warm and tingly down there, and when touched, it's actually so sensitive it almost tickles — in a good way, of course. Foria doesn't necessarily bring you to an orgasm faster (although for some, it can, since it can increase arousal), but it's the grand finale where you really feel major the results. Climaxes are deeper and way more intense than anything I've ever experienced. They feel all-consuming! Orgasms also can go on for longer; it can feel like it's going to last forever, and if anything is going to be eternal, I think we can all agree that an orgasm would be our top pick.

Health and Wellness

While the oil hasn't been evaluated by the FDA, the company says that safety and purity is "of paramount importance." "Our cannabis oil is extracted using leading-edge solvent- free pharmaceutical grade processes that provide extracts in their purest possible form," the site says. To ensure the cleanest and safest final product, the company tests Foria at multiple stages; it tests for potency, pesticides, residual solvents, and microbials. The products undergo something called a "hot-fill" bottling process, allowing Foria to produce a "microbial-free product without the use of artificial preservatives," the site says. The bottom line is that Foria is natural, and the product is made up of two very basic components: cannabis oil and coconut oil.

As with any product, you should always use at your own risk and consult your healthcare provider, because plant medicine, like any other kind of medicine, works differently with different bodies.

To be clear, Foria isn't a product designed to get you high the way that smoking or ingesting cannabis would; it is a topical "pre-lubricant" meant to be sprayed, then absorbed. It is not latex-safe and not recommended for use with latex condoms. While I enjoyed all of my experiences, everyone is different, and it may not be for everyone. It is currently only available in states where marijuana is legalized.

Beyond Pleasure

Foria turned me on, it spiced up sex with my partner, and it gave me some of the best orgasms of my life. But it goes beyond that. A sexual enhancement product for women is empowering; it places the focus of pleasure and completion on women and those with vaginas. It's something we can enjoy alone or with a partner, and it is a novelty in that its central purpose is to optimize the female sexual experience. Bottom line? I'll be using it again. And again.


Feminism in men is a clinical condition caused by low testosterone. It bears some similarity to chemical castration, and can be medicated through testosterone replacement therapy or androgenic herbals like tongkat ali or butea superba.


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