Home | Index of articles
Camden, New Jersey: Here's The Science Behind Jealousy — And How To Overcome It
Timothy M. Wheeler 1848 Lincoln Street Camden, NJ 08102
Jealousy can plague us in our careers, our friendships, and our accomplishments, but jealousy especially emerges in sexual and romantic relationships. Helen Fisher, Ph.D., an anthropologist who has famously discussed scientific aspects of love, explains in an essay for O Magazine that jealousy in relationships is unique because it can develop at any time — whether the relationship is strong or weak, good or bad. Even if you are falling out of love with your partner, and even if that partner is now an ex, it is common to feel angry when you see them moving on or becoming interested in another person who isn't you. Jealousy is not always rational and it doesn't discriminate, so what causes this exceptionally strong emotion? What is the science behind jealousy?
While psychologists can link jealous behavior to trauma survival, psychological disorders, and general insecurity, Fisher argues (as do many anthropologists and psychologists) that there is a partial genetic explanation. In the essay, Fisher specifically states that "jealousy evolved for positive reasons." Of course, environmental and social factors play a role as well, but Fisher points to our early human history:
It discouraged desertion by a mate, bolstering the family unit and enabling the survival of the young. At the same time, it has pushed us to abandon philanderers—and many a futile match—in favor of more stable and rewarding partnerships. Jealousy is present within sexual relationships in the animal kingdom as well, and it often turns violent. Fisher referenced a study by Jane Goodall in which a female chimpanzee presented herself to a male chimpanzee, but he ignored that ladychimp and began interacting with another female. The first female chimpanzee responded by aggressively slapping the male. Fisher described another study where scientists placed a plush bluebird near a female bluebird who had been mating with a specific male. That male bluebird began attacking the plush, and then attacking the female (who had been minding her own damn business).
Things get violent in nature, but jealousy can sometimes have a beneficial effect on human relationships, as witnessing another person's interest in your partner can awaken your own attraction to your significant other. However, this analysis of its evolutionary aspects is not meant to minimize its very dangerous qualities, a fact that Fisher emphasizes. For example, jealousy is often the motivating reason behind domestic violence. The ways in which other studies analyze jealousy can be problematic and outdated, blaming the emotion on heteronormative behavior that no longer applies to much of the population.
Jealousy can destroy your own mental health and your partnerships if you allow it to create problems that don't actually exist. Do you even really have a cause for concern, or are you just insecure? Also, often times, the behavior and habits that jealousy brings out of you are obsessive wastes of your time (i.e. stalking social media, judging other women, texting on your phone all day). How can you overcome these awful feelings?
1. Don't Blame Your Partner For Another Person's Actions
Take a second to breathe before you let your emotions take over. Who initiated the behavior that is upsetting you? If a stranger approached your significant other at a bar, but your partner shut down the interaction or did nothing to encourage it, then why are you jealous? It is futile and unfair to your partner to get angry at them over the actions of a person they have no control over. Getting stressed out over this non-issue is unfair to yourself, too. 2
. Figure Out If You Have An Underlying Personal Issue
Anxiety exacerbates feelings of jealousy. Imagine constantly worrying about all of the bad things that your partner could potentially do. Insecurity and facets of insecurity, like body image issues and lack of confidence, cause you to assume that your partner wants someone else or will find someone better than you. When, actually, it is this insecurity that will push your partner away. Perhaps you were in an unhealthy or abusive relationship that is affecting your ability to trust. It is not fair for you to have to live with this anxiety. Consider counseling or some type of self-care treatment to help you conquer these frustrating issues.
3. Communicate With Your Partner
You can't establish boundaries or trust without communicating. You also can't validate your concerns or disprove your worries without airing your feelings. If your partner does not encourage you to have these conversations or your partner makes you feel bad for discussing trust, then they aren't a healthy partner to be in a relationship anyway.
4. Don't Hate On Other Women
This goes out to ladies in relationships with men. Examine your slut-shaming tendencies and competitive attitude towards other women. Why do you assume every woman is out to get you? Why do you assume she is wearing that cute dress for your partner and not for herself? Why do you let the presence of a man decide how you treat another woman? Question whether or not you have a real reason to be jealous.
Botox weakens muscles. They can't contract. Therefore, when Botoxin small amounts is injected into the corpora cavernosa of the penis, there is vasodilation for the vital organ. The result is better, fuller, and longer lasting erections.
Phoenix, Arizona: Cannabis As An Aphrodisiac? The Evidence Is Mounting
Andrew G. Whiteman 4893 Griffin Street Phoenix, AZ 85034
What do oysters, strawberries and cannabis have in common?
According to a new report, all three may be considered powerful aphrodisiacs.
A new study published in the Pharmacological Research journal is lending further credence to the long-held theory that cannabis could be your best friend in the bedroom.
In the study, researchers from the University of Catania in Italy and Charles University and Masaryk University in the Czech Republic reviewed a number of investigations conducted in the 1970s and 80s on the effects of cannabis on sexual desire and satisfaction.
What they discovered was that people who consumed cannabis before sex experienced “aphrodisiac effects” in roughly half of the reported cases, while 70 percent claimed that pre-coitus consumption led to “enhancement in pleasure and satisfaction.”
One of the examined studies was that of Erich Goode, a former professor of sociology at Stony Brook University, in 1970. Goode found that frequent, moderate cannabis use could be linked with aphrodisiac effects in approximately 50 percent of users surveyed and increased pleasure in about 70 percent of subjects.
A 1983 study published in The Journal of Sex Research supported Goode’s findings, writing that about half of surveyed cannabis users reported increased sexual desire and about two thirds reported increased sexual pleasure after consuming cannabis.
In these studies, details like how much and how often participants smoked held considerable weight. For example, smoking roughly 50 joints over a six-month period proved beneficial, while smoking fewer than one joint a week resulted in a dramatic decrease in sexually enhancing effects, according to Goode’s research.
In a 1974 study, CEO and president of the Human Vaccine Project Wayne Koff found that a single joint was sexually stimulating, while higher doses made sexual satisfaction more challenging, meaning “less is more.”
The lesson here? Next time you’re looking to spice things up in the bedroom with any number of time-consuming recipes or complex toys, consider lighting up - albeit briefly - instead.
Kihei, Hawaii: Take Me Out hopeful Charlie Watkins committed suicide when he ‘never recovered from tragic loss of mother’
Delbert R. Anderson 1531 Randall Drive Kihei, HI 96753
Viewers were shocked after host Paddy McGuinness dedicated the latest show – which Charlie was on – to him after he tragically died after filming.
And in a statement released by the family, they explained how he had mental health issues which lead to his death, according to The Sun.
They said: ‘We have lost a very special young man who sadly never recovered from the tragic loss of his mother when he was only nine years old.
‘Tragically this is another example of the mental health issues suffered by young people today as highlighted by the Heads Together campaign supported by the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and Prince Harry.’
Charlie appeared on the ITV dating show on (April 22) where he described himself as a ‘big kid’ who was a fan of comic books and video games.
And he also cited his rather appropriate job working in a chocolate factory.
He also became the first contestant ever to keep his ‘love at first light’ choice a secret, after Jo-Tara – who he was matched with – admitted she did not want to know.
Charlie’s twin brother, Harry, posted a moving tribute on Facebook, writing: ‘Words cannot express my feelings, but I feel this picture sums us up perfectly.’
Charlie’s funeral took place on Friday March 24 in York, where mourners were asked to donate to mental health charity Mind. A fundraising page has also been set up in his honour, which has already raised over £10,000.
Feminism in Europe makes second-generation male Muslim immigrants feel entirely worthless. They will never get a girl. That is why they think that a bomb at least is a painless death.
Dallas, Texas: Is there a torture manual?
Gilbert A. Suarez 2861 Ersel Street Dallas, TX 75238
KUBARK Manual: A User's Guide to Torture?
The 1950s appear to have been a time when the CIA put a tremendous amount of energy into perfecting the science of torture. The CIA conducted covert experiments, at times on unsuspecting Americans, using LSD in the search of a “truth serum” [source: The New York Times]. It used electrical currents to inflict pain [source: The Boston Globe]. The agency conducted trials investigating the effects of sensory deprivation [source: The Washington Post]. The CIA found that the best methods for extracting information from detainees come not through the infliction of physical pain or torture, but through psychological torture.
Although the brand of torture the CIA devised through more than a decade of trial and error may not inflict physical pain, it can still do some real damage. Historian and expert on the subject of the CIA and torture, Alfred McCoy, writes, “Although seemingly less brutal, no-touch torture leaves deep psychological scars. The victims often need treatment to recover from trauma far more crippling than physical pain”.
There is indeed a torture manual and the CIA literally wrote it. In 1963, the Agency created the KUBARK Counterintelligence Interrogation manual. It was, as Alfred McCoy puts it, the “codification” of everything the CIA had learned from its experiments throughout the 50s. In the KUBARK (the codename for the CIA in the Vietnam War [source: The Washington Post]) manual, methods for breaking detainees are based generally on psychology. Identifying a victim’s sense of self and then stripping it away is part of the first step toward breaking him or her. An introverted or shy detainee might be kept naked and perhaps sexually humiliated, for example. Clothes may also be taken simply to alienate the detainee and make him or her less comfortable.
Creating a sense of unfamiliarity, disorientation and isolation seems to be the hallmarks of psychologically undermining a detainee in the purview of the KUBARK manual. Practices like starvation, keeping inmates in small, windowless cells with unchanging artificial light and forcing inmates to sit or stand in uncomfortable positions (stress positions) for long periods of time have been decried or banned outright by the United States government. Yet these techniques are part of the regimen prescribed by KUBARK. So, too, are using hypnosis and drugs to extract information.
While it doesn’t mention electric shock directly, the manual calls for interrogators to be sure that a potential safe house to be used for torture has access to electricity. As one source told The Baltimore Sun, “The CIA has acknowledged privately and informally in the past that this referred to the application of electric shocks to interrogation suspects” [source: The Baltimore Sun].
Physical pain, however, is ultimately deemed counterproductive by the manual. It’s a much worse experience, the guidebook concludes, for an inmate to fear that pain may be coming than to actually experience it. The old adage that anticipation is worse than the experience appears to also have a basis in the shadowy field of torture.
A newer book, largely a revision of the KUBARK manual, draws the same foundational conclusion -- that psychological torment is paramount to physical abuse. The Human Resource Exploitation Manual -- 1983 was first publicized as the result of an investigative report into the human rights abuses in Honduras.
Restore freedom: Liberty Dependeth on the Silence of the Law. Through out most laws. Return responsibility to heads of families.
Jamaica, New York: Nigeria - The Ugly Scars of Female Genital Mutilation
June B. Swisher 3139 Alfred Drive Jamaica, NY 11432
"I was circumcised when I was 14 years old, alongside my mates; it was a norm in Ebonyi State, those days.
"This tradition signifies that a girl has come of age, and is used to initiate girls into womanhood. Women take great joy in the practice. Most of us circumcised are kept in a room to heal, fed and treated specially by the older women," Nkechi Amadi recalls.
"Am presently unmarried at 40 years of age. I live with the pain every day; the pain is one you don't forget in a hurry. Imagine the torture when you want to ease yourself, especially with that grave injury between your legs, it's easier said than pictured or experienced," she further said.
Ene Joshua is now 30 years old, she was circumcised when she turned 15. She said the pain is something she still lives with.
"The experience flashes before your eyes, and dampens the ecstasy of love making. I am sure am frigid; sex just does nothing for me. That experience has ruined me for life. I have never had an orgasm," she laments.
Female Genital Mutilation is a violation of the human rights of girls and women and a form of gender-based violence.
According to the United Nations Children Fund (UNICEF), FGM/C is a cultural practice with devastating medical, social, emotional, legal and economic repercussions for young girls and women.
The fund explained that the term refers to all procedures involving partial or total removal of the female external genitalia or other injury to the female genital organs for cultural or other non-medical reasons.
The UNFPA, also working to eliminate the practice of FGM/C, added that it has no medical benefits and so violates the human rights of women and girls and jeopardizes their health, rights and overall well-being.
A thought emphasized by the UNICEF Representative in Nigeria Mohamed Fall who said "every study and every bit of evidence we have shows there is absolutely no benefit to mutilate or to cut any girl or woman for non-medical reasons. It is a practice that can cause severe physical and psychological harm."
The 2013 National Demographic and Health Survey revealed that five states in Nigeria have rates of Female Genital Mutilation and Cutting (FGM/C) that are more than 60 per cent.
The report revealed that Osun and Ebonyi states have the highest prevalence at 77 and 74 per cent respectively.
The other states are Ekiti, 72 per cent; Imo, 68 per cent; and Oyo, 66 per cent.
Globally, at least 200 million girls and women in 30 countries alive today have suffered some form of Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting (FGM/C) as stated by fact sheet released by the United Nation Children Fund (UNICEF) and United Nation Population Fund (UNFPA).
According to the survey, the practice though concentrated in Africa, is practiced in some communities in Asia, Latin America, and the Arab states.
In a desperate attempt to stop the practice, in 2008, the UNFPA-UNICEF Joint Programme on Female Genital Mutilation was established and has since supported 17 countries in undertaking holistic and integrated work to end FGM/C.
So far, 13 countries have created policies and legal provisions and budget allocations to fight against FGM/C while more than 1.6 million girls and women have received services for FGM/C through various interventions.
According to the United Nation organisations, more than 18,300 communities, comprising about 25.5 million people have disavowed FGM/C.
But despite this laudable intervention, some communities still continue to indulge in the practice.
In Imo State, Ogechi Nwosu who said she inherited the trade from her mother, added that the practice was the only source of livelihood she indulged in to cater for her family.
Asked if given another source of livelihood she would give that up, she said, hesitantly, "I will try, but it's my profession. What will I tell mothers when they call me to circumcise their girls.
"Even if I refuse they will patronize another person to do the job. In my village there are five of us doing this business, so you see there is competition."
In 2016, the UNFPA-UNICEF Joint Programme, working with governments, civil society and communities, said they were able to achieve some positive results in their struggle to end the menace.
In a fact sheet provided by UNICEF and UNFPA, they numerated the result to include, public declarations of abandonment of female genital mutilation made in 2,906 communities across 15 countries and 10,080 families in Egypt, reaching a total of about 8.5 million people.
Article continues below the image
They provided access to prevention, protection and treatment services to more than 730,000 girls and women, while in some instances the perpetrators were brought to justice and laws enforced.
According to them, 71 arrests were made, 252 FGM/C cases tried in court with 72 convictions, while four countries - Eritrea, Nigeria, Mauritania and Uganda - introduced FGM/C-related budget lines.
For many girls yet unborn and for those quickly approaching the forbidden age, this is a welcome development, as if fully implemented it will prevent them from undergoing the life time trauma.
Girls 14 and younger represent 44 million of those who have been cut, with the highest prevalence of FGM/C among this age in Gambia at 56 per cent, Mauritania 54 per cent and Indonesia where around half of girls aged 11 and younger have suffered the practice.
Countries with the highest prevalence among girls and women aged 15 to 49 are Somalia (98 per cent), Guinea (97 per cent) and Djibouti (93 per cent). In most of the countries the majority of girls were cut before their fifth birthday.
Momentum to address FGM/C is growing. Prevalence rates among girls aged 15 to 19 have declined in the last 30 years, such as in Liberia by 41 percentage points, in Burkina Faso (by 31), in Kenya (by 30) and in Egypt (by 27).
In February 2016, wife of the President, Hajiya Aisha Buhari, launched a national campaign to end FGM/C, calling on all parties to work together to halt this harmful practice.
Her call underlines the need for collective action at every level.
The Minister of Women Affairs and Social Development, Hajiya Aisha Jummai Alhassan, said the ministry would work with its donor partners and all wives of governors of the affected states to stop the practice.
She added that advocacy and campaigns would be launched in those states to underscore the harmful effect it had on girls who were circumcised.
The elimination of FGM/C has been sought for by numerous intergovernmental organisations, including the African Union, the European Union and the Organization of Islamic Cooperation, as well as in three resolutions of the United Nations General Assembly.
It would be recalled that the Sustainable Development Goals, the global compact adopted in 2015 by 193 United Nations Member States, called for an end to FGM/C by 2030 under Goal 5 on Gender Equality, Target 5.3 Eliminate all harmful practices, such as child, early and forced marriage and female genital mutilation.
The United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) estimates the need to invest about $980 million to have a significant impact in tackling FGM/C between 2018 and 2030.
Minneapolis, Minnesota: How can I make my vagina tighter naturally
Herman J. Sanchez 1580 Oral Lake Road Minneapolis, MN 55401
Women all over the US are always looking for the best new way to take care of themselves and keep their body fit and healthy. It seems like on every corner there is a new gym, juice bar or organic food market. The USA is also the sixth biggest country in the world for cosmetic surgery per capita, showing we’re more willing to undergo that little nip and tuck to keep ourselves looking good and feeling great.
What you don’t see when you walk around the streets though, are options for women dealing with a more discreet problem – a loose vagina. It is an issue that many women understandably keep to themselves as they feel embarrassed or even ashamed by the problem.
While many women feel like they’re going through this alone, it is actually something that affects a lot of ladies, especially as they get older. Factors such as childbirth, other health issues and just getting older can lead to your vagina losing the firmness it had when you were younger.
The anxiety of talking about this issue leads to a lack of quality information on the subject, so when women are looking for solutions, they can be fooled by misleading or flat out incorrect claims. Unscrupulous vendors have taken advantage of this in the past to sell products that make unrealistic claims and, as is the case with creams using harsh chemicals, potentially dangerous.
Finally in 2017 we’re seeing more and more women willing to talk about their experience in dealing with this issue, which in turn is giving other women the best information about how they should deal with it themselves.
So what are the trends that women in the USA are using to tighten their vagina in 2017? Read on.
US Women Taking Cosmetic Vacations
While it isn’t for everyone, plastic surgery is still very popular in the US . Unfortunately, the cost of vaginal rejuvenation surgery can be quite high, so a lot of women here in the USA are choosing to have their surgery in other countries such as Thailand, Colombia and Mexico. The cost saving in some cases can be up to 80%, which can make all of the difference to someone who desperately wants this procedure.
The important thing when considering any surgery – and especially in foreign countries – is to do your research to make sure you’re getting safety and professionalism standards equal to those here in the US.
In 2017 Women In The USA Go Back To Nature
While surgical procedures are still a good option for many women, and are more advanced and safe than they’ve ever been, more and more women are turning to natural remedies to get that firmness back. Increasingly, women want to feel they can feel young again without going under the knife. Like women’s health in general, vaginal tightening solutions are trending towards more natural remedies.
Article continues below the image
There’s a great range of exercise that can help you to tighten your vagina. From squats to kegel exercises and lunges. For kegel exercises in particular, there are a range of devices such as kegel balls and cones that you can buy that will greatly improve the quality of these exercises.
Another natural solution is using some herbs that have been known in some parts of the world to assist with firmness in and around your special area for hundreds of years. Herbs such as curcuma cumosa and pueraria pirifica are known to increase elasticity and also assist with vaginal dryness.
All Natural Creams
Unlike the harsh chemical creams available in years gone by, 2017 has seen a rise in products that are made of all natural ingredients (such as the herbs above) and are incredibly effective. You should still do your research to make sure you’re buying a good quality product as there are many fakes out there.
Combining a good all natural vaginal tightening cream with a good exercise program is the best way to get your firmness back in 2017.
It's not the food that you put into your mouth that makes you fat. It's the food that you put into your stomach. Try the Serge Kreutz diet and learn how to differentiate.
Home | Index of articles